Basics, Links, Pedagogy, Psychology

How to be boring

A popular blog managed not to conform to the zeitgeist. I found this treasure trove of ways to lose friends and alienate people:

  1. Negative egocentrism. The #1 most boring way of behaving was what the researchers described as “being negative and complaining, talking about one’s problems, displaying disinterest in others.”
  2. Banality. “Talking about trivial or superficial things, being interested in only one topic, and repeating the same stories and jokes again and again.”
  3. Low affectivity. Showing little enthusiasm, speaking in a monotone, engaging in very little eye contact, behaving in a very unexpressive way.
  4. Tediousness. “Talking slowly, pausing a long time before responding, taking a long time to make one’s points, and dragging conversations on.”
  5. Passivity. Having little to say, not having any opinions, being too predictable or too likely to try to conform with what everyone else is saying.
  6. Self-preoccupation. Talking all about yourself.
  7. Seriousness. Coming across as very serious, rarely smiling.
  8. Boring ingratiation. “Trying to be funny or nice in order to impress other people.”
  9. Distraction. Doing things that interfere with the conversation, getting sidetracked too easily, and engaging in too much small talk.

This list is interesting in light of what I would call the modern socio-sexual emergency, namely that marriages appear to be becoming less pleasant and less common over time, and I think it’s because people are becoming less interesting and less pleasant. Several of these elements of being perfectly boring are so prevalent in the current year as to be indistinguishable from appropriate behavior. For instance, negative ego-centrism and passivity go together in the victim mindset. Everything is wrong with me and nobody will fix it. This attitude is only endearing to mothers, which is why men who have it marry wives who parent them. Negative ego-centrism also goes with banality, distraction, self-preoccupation, and low-affectivity. People spend so much time in video-games, at boring jobs, and watching TV and porn, that normal conversations are boring and there are less big-ideas, big visions, and plans in their heads. It’s sad, but true. I suspect a lack of genuine spiritual aspiration leads to low aspiration in general.

I’m glad I’m married, the sexual market place is unappealing at this point.

Anyhow, hope this helps you learn to be un-charismatic and incapable of making friends.

On the other hand, you could do the opposite of these things and enjoy your New Year little bit more.

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *