In a psychology today article I found this treasure trove of ways to lose friends and alienate people:
- The #1 most boring way of behaving was what the researchers called “negative egocentrism” – “being negative and complaining, talking about one’s problems, displaying disinterest in others”
- Banality – “talking about trivial or superficial things, being interested in only one topic, and repeating the same stories and jokes again and again”
- Low affectivity – showing little enthusiasm, speaking in a monotone, engaging in very little eye contact, behaving in a very unexpressive way
- Tedious – “talking slowly, pausing a long time before responding, taking a long time to make one’s points, and dragging conversations on”
- Passivity – having little to say, not having any opinions, being too predictable or too likely to try to conform with what everyone else is saying
- Self-preoccupation – this one is obvious: talking all about yourself
- Seriousness – coming across as very serious, rarely smiling
- Boring ingratiation – “trying to be funny or nice in order to impress other people”
- Distraction – doing things that interfere with the conversation, getting sidetracked too easily, and engaging in too much small talk
Source: “What Makes People Boring?,” accessed September 30, 2014, x
I hope this helps anybody learn to be un-charismatic and incapable of making friends.
On the other hand, you could do the opposite of these things and enjoy your life a little bit more.